As you are in the holidays-spirit and meet people, I just thought to share a warm reminder that not all genuine hardships can be seen. The person sitting next to you might be fighting a difficult battle that is unseen. Do not overwhelm people by reminding them of their issues if they act differently. Please do not compare your situation to theirs especially if you are in a better state than them, for example sharing about your good health when they are sick can cause them anxiety or stress. If you have no support to offer then at least genuinely pray for their healing. Materialistic things can be bought, but in my opinion, what matters the most is the time, emotions, and the quality of thoughts that you choose to give.
If someone is trying to heal from health issues that cannot be seen, then it could already be difficult for them to share their issues with even their own family. If they make the effort to share them with you, then please let them know that you won’t judge them and that you won’t push your opinions on them. You may offer support by just being with them, and by listening to them, even if that means listening again to the same thing that they might have already shared. You can ask them what you can do for them. Most of the time, they won’t have an answer to that, so just listen to whatever they can say. As always, show empathy and pray for their healing!
May the holidays bring me, you and the world with immense healing and good health.
Do you sometimes find yourself in a sad mood, feel sullen or just do not know why you are unable to keep yourself happy? It is normal to sometimes feel low and feel the need to have someone make things right for you or just make you smile. However, unless you live in a fantasy world, it is not possible for someone to always be there for you. It is fabulous if you have someone who is close to you by heart but they might not always be able to lighten up your mood. One of my favorite life mantras is that, only you can make yourself happy and if you realize this, then there would never be any situation from which you would not be able to lift yourself up. In one of my previous blogposts, I wrote about how you can have a happy state of mind to keep yourself happy. Today, I am going to share another way of how you can make yourself happy. I am going to term this as the “Mind-Blowing” exercise. Following are the steps for this exercise:
Just sit in your most comfortable position and take a few deep breaths.
This might sound a little unusual and will take some effort but start blowing your mind (reflect back) by trying to think about all your achievements, starting with the oldest one that you can remember.
Note: you might not always remember all your achievements but sometimes visuals can help. For example, a photo of you when you participated in a school program or in a work event; a paper that you wrote; your kid’s photos; a thank you e-mail from a volunteer organization; or if you are at home, then just look around and acknowledge that you have a place to live.
Thinking about the past can bring up some bad memories as well. However, it is up to you to utilize those memories in a strategic way. Just briefly pause as you recollect your past memories.
Do not dive deep into the bad memories but just pause enough to acknowledge the struggles you faced, the situations you lived through, the obstacles or the hindrances that you overcame, and any negative vibes that you had around you.
Now just in your mind, put together all your achievements and your struggles. Think about how you worked through all your struggles and negativity that happened around you in the past and you still had those “made it” or “successful” moments.
Finally, take a few moments to be proud of yourself (not cocky), realize all that you have achieved, feel where you are today and understand how far you have come.
After step 7, you might actually want to spend some moments to celebrate your life. Blowing your mind strategically to reflect back on your wonderful journey will steer your mind away from any negative thoughts, any unhappy vibes or any anxiousness. It will make you realize not just all your achievements but also your capabilities, courage, potential and all of that will fire up your confidence and make you happy. Take it as a blessing if you ever had an opportunity to experience any kind of hardship. If you have surpassed hardships and achieved things in the past, then you probably have learned from your past experiences and have fueled your potential to achieve even bigger things.
Life is ever evolving and so are the things that make us happy. What we liked last year, might not mesmerize us now and vice-versa. Taking out some “me” time can help us realize how far we have come, what gives us delight and what we do not like. Life happens every moment. It is never too late to adopt new rituals. I believe that an important daily ritual should be to check on ourselves and acknowledge our feelings. We need to do some positive self-realization everyday to call out the things that bring joy in our life. I believe that self-realization is an essential fragment that brings together our doings and feelings. A moment of self-realization can help us to filter out our “stress” stuff and just get enraptured with what is left behind…the “happy” stuff. Express what makes your heart happy and enjoy the moment of enrapture.
Do you carry the stuff that you don’t like? When you go on a trip, do you pack all the stuff that you love or do you also carry the weight of the items that not only need extra room but are useless or you don’t even love them? Similarly, don’t carry the extra weight of all the negative things in your life. Fears and negativity come to you only if you let them come to your mind. Do not let any actions or words hurt you if you want to take care of your mind and body. Not everyone is going to love you or treat you back the way you love them or treat them. Your mind is the only place that will help you think through your whole life and your body is the only place that you and your mind will live in. Love yourself and take care of yourself. Don’t carry that extra baggage with you throughout your life.
“If you don’t control your mind, your mind will control you.” – Unknown. That is pretty easy to understand but it is often not practiced. If we overthink anything, those thoughts occupy our mind and then dictate our behaviour. Overtime, that can lead to an anxious state of mind.
If thoughts restrain us from doing the next best thing that we want to do, then we need to analyze our thoughts. We need to check if our thoughts are actually rational and if they are inhibitors to our confidence or growth. Fears of any kind, thinking about failures and any other irrational or negative thoughts will just lead to a negative mind, which doesn’t make us feel any better or healthier. We can make ourselves happy by not paying any attention to the thoughts that do not make us feel good. That is one easy way (if not the easiest) to control our mind. It is as simple as that but it just needs to be regularly practiced in order to relax the mind and stay positive. Always remember that if some thoughts do not make us feel good, then those are not healthy thoughts and we need to let go of them as soon as possible and move forward. – Yuvika